10 reasons why I won't follow

It used to feel like Twitter was a strange universe, in comparison to the once wonderful (and yet now dull and boring) world of Facebook.  I followed some people, not even sure why, and some of them followed back.  My timeline would be blasted with links about "Building your SEO!" and "Need a Realtor in Kentucky?".  Two problems with that - #1. SEO? Senior Excellent Officer? what the hell did that even mean? and #2. I don't live in Kentucky, and probably never will.

Now that I have a better handle on how Twitter works, I pay close attention to who spams my timeline with what.  I actually do some homework before I follow, and here is a few of the reasons I may not follow back:

1. If I click on your profile and your avatar is an egg. Eggs are not people, they are just eggs.

2. If I read through your timeline and you don't RT, well, then I think you're selfish.

3. If every other day you want me to "RT this to win!" Unless it's free cake - I'm not interested.

4. If I'm following you on Twitter, I probably am not going to "Like" you on facebook too. That has to be a violation of sector code something something in the Twitter handbook. (If one exists)

5. If you are a girl offering me the most 'wild and naughty' night of my life, and your picture is of a scene from Boogie Nights (yes, the one in the bathroom....) - I figure it's not my female attention you really want.

6. If I follow someone, and get an auto DM - I'm out.  I know where this is headed.

7. If you don't engage in conversation, or you pick a fight over Twitter - consider yourself unfollowed (excludes celebrities and celebrity gossip updates)

8. If you are constantly tweeting negative things, I need happy in my life so go update your Facebook status for pity.

9. If your profile link is to a spam website. I don't eat Spam, and I sure as hell don't read it.

10. If I say I want to watch a movie, it doesn't mean I want to "WIN FREE TICKETS" If I wanted free tickets, Id say "I want free tickets to a movie!" That's how it works.

So, if I have unfollowed anyone for any of these reasons - now you know why.  Being human is the greatest thing about Twitter.  Talk to people, they talk back, everyone is happy and spam free.  To easily adjust your "following" list, use Tweepi.  It's a free, fast and easy way to accomplish a happy timeline :)